All We Need is Love



What I Need.

As I meditate on what I need most in order to curate a deliciously joyful life; I understand that the single greatest gear that I can equip myself with is love.  The best path to love is to embark on a journey within.


I grew up with a mom whose love for me was immense. She gave me all she had to give but some how I still did not feel lovable. There was a sadness that I carried like a backpack full of books that I didn’t want to read, and I couldn’t put it down, or at least I didn’t know that I could at the time.

I traveled through my experiences trying to look like I had it all together, not wanting others to see that I was broken. I mean I must have been if my own father didn’t love me. Yes mom was there but my dad, not so much, and it stung. I longed for my dad but he’d left my mom for a much younger model, (a whole other story). I remember questioning why I wasn’t good enough for him to love.

Was it Just Me?

I became an inauthentic version of myself, a people pleasing nicey nice; so not the real me. Kind yes, generous but not nice. It took years and some therapy to see what I was doing, to understand that I was trying to be what I thought was needed in order to deserve to be liked and eventually loved.

     I was so weird, awkward, peering into people trying to figure out what they wanted me to do, be, say, so that they’d like me. It never crossed my mind to question what I liked in a person. I just assumed that most everyone else were confidently thriving, unbothered by insecurities. It took me experiencing someone who I thought was perfect screwing up royally for me to look more closely and see that almost no one had it all together and that I wasn’t as flawed as I’d thought.

Proceed with caution.

When we truly love ourselves enough to care about how we feel, we will carefully choose the people we allow into our lives. Even being cautious about family members. Love them yes, but not giving them power over our state of being.   Setting boundaries will become a priority because we understand that in this life, we only have a certain amount of time and we want to spend as much of that time as we choose to be in a good feeling state. 

When we feel good, we emanate good energy and what we emanate comes back to us.  When we love ourselves, we pay attention to how we feel about the places that we spend our time. Everything from our places of employment, to where we live.  If it doesn’t feel good, we should devise a plan to make it feel better or seek out new environments that help us thrive. 

When we really love ourselves, we pay attention to the way certain foods make us feel; of course there are some foods that nourish us and provide us with energy and a lightness, where other foods might taste good in the moment but leave us feeling drained.   When we love ourselves enough to care about how we feel, we no longer allow things, people or even our own thoughts to deplete us.  Have a negative thought, dump it immediately and replace it with a positive one.  When we love ourselves enough to pay attention to how we feel then everything else that we need and even want will find its way to us, we will create it by living loving lives that emanate joy which will bring more joy right back to us.💞

To Love Oneself is the beginning of a Lifelong Romance

Peter McWilliams

Fear Sucks!

Ok so fear can be a useful tool, when we understand that it is to be used to help find a solution to protect ourselves in the face of real danger. However, more often it is the case that many of us allow our fears to control our lives. We decline living and loving because we perceive a threat without determining if the threat is real.
In life we are really on a journey to love, loving ourselves and others. It is pretty much impossible to be loving when we allow fear to control the way we treat others as well as ourselves.
Recently on a vacation with my family, I had an opportunity to have the experience of going pontooning. I had never done it before and so I declined out of fear. I saw another group go and realized that it was no big deal, just fun. Well my family had already gone out on the water and I was left back in the beach just relaxing.
Not the worse thing I know, but think about all of the friendships that could be made but are not because of fear, careers that are never Pursued, innovation/inventions never developed because we are afraid.
We deny ourselves richly rewarding opportunities and experiences when we live in fear.
In order to really be the love that we were created to be, to live the lives of joy and prosperity, we need to put fear in its place.


Elegant ladyThere is nothing more stunning than a woman who knows who she is, loves herself and as a result treats herself well.  The thing that stands out in her is the confidence that she exudes.  Because she is well aware of her relevance she is able to love freely and completely, helping to make the world a better place.  She is a role-model and example of how to live, love and serve in a world that can at times seem unaware of those extremely vital qualities.

Getting There

How can a woman obtain such stature one might ask?

The answer is simple, by seeking God.  She understands that at the top of her to do list should not be to obtain fabulous shoes and homes or to impress the world with her knowledge or abilities but instead to live and use what she has been given to help people grow closer to God; to their truth.

She knows that she must live her life in service to others and she understands that she must do so in love. 1 Cor. chapter 13 from the Bible teaches that we can give and do all sorts of things but if they are not done in love then it has been a waste of time and means nothing.

I Challenge anyone who wants to live a stunning life to read 1 Corinthians chapter 13: 1 -13 because it has changed my life and continues to do so.  It helps me to deal with people and life situations in a Godly way instead of my way, which could be rude or anger filed were I not aware that I can choose differently.

To seek God for me was to read and study to learn truly what God was, is, and forever will be.  What I have learned is that God is love.  It is important to arm one’s self with love by taking it in through our thinking and our senses.  Are we watching programing that would support or promote love in some real way?  Are we listening to music that conditions the heart to be more loving?  Are we keeping company with people who fill our hearts with joy because of their loving nature?   Are we eating foods most often, which nurture us and enable us to feel satisfied and healthy?   Are we focusing our thinking on positive things that will help us develop into the women we want to be?   Most of us are innately nurturing care takers rushing around for everyone else while neglecting ourselves.

Whose Loving You


If a woman is going to be stunning then she must love herself, for it is impossible to love others without loving you first.  Often times a person can be under the delusion that they love themselves but saying it does not make it so.  It is in the being, the doing that expresses love.  If you only told others that you loved them but never did much to show it, how could they trust your love for them?  If you never showed up to an important event, been a shoulder to cry on or a source of support, then your words would be meaningless.  Well the same is true for you.

Getting ready for the dayTalk is cheap; you need to prove to you that you matter.  You need to show up for you.   Don’t wait until you are going someplace special to treat yourself well.  When you get up in the morning after you give thanks for another day, take care of you.  Make the time to do whatever it takes to make you feel special.  It is different for everyone and there are no hard rules just spend time with you.  Read, meditate; give yourself a mini facial, put on clothes that really make you feel stunning.  If jeans and a t-shirt does that for you, than you are on your way to having a great day.  How about taking a few extra minutes to put on make-up?  If it only takes a smidge of mascara and a lip gloss to make you feel great then why not do that little thing for you.  Go ahead; be stunning and love yourself today.